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Wednesday, February 1, 2012

Not a Happy Weigh In

I am so mad at myself right now. I am disappointed in myself as well.

This past weekend my honey and I went on an impromptu weekend getaway to Savannah, GA and St. Augustine, FL. It was an amazing weekend with just the two of us. Since our kids are all adults now we finally are having some time to ourselves. We never had that before because when we got married I already had my 2 oldest children from my first marriage. We were an instant family and even when we were dating most of our dates were "family" dates; trips to the zoo, kid movies, carnivals, etc. After we were married my husband adopted my children so we literally were an instant family. The funny thing is the two oldest children's adoption was finalized the same week that our son was born. So we were in the courtroom with our 5 day old baby boy, our 2 year old son, and 5 year old daughter, after the judge granted my husband the adoption of my children he asked my husband how old the baby was, my husband responded that the baby was 5 days old. The judge shook his head and chuckled and he said to my husband "Mr. Foreman, the Office of Vital Statistics is going to think you have been one busy man, 3 new kids in one week" It is kind of cool that all 3 of their birth certificates were all filed the same week. Anyway, coming back from my ADD trip, so the hubs and I have never had a time in our marriage where it was just us, no kids. Now that the kids are 18, 21, and almost 24 we are finally getting that time.

Anyway, I am coming up on my one year anniversary with Weight Watchers which means I have been in Maintenance now since I reached my goal weight on October 11th, 2011 (almost 7 months after I began the program) I have been doing a fairly good job of maintaining my weight and would fluctuate between 133 - 134 pounds (which I am SO proud of). Well I am angry and disappointed because while we were away for our weekend I did NOT make healthy choices for eating. I ate fried chicken, macaroni and cheese, pancakes, etc. I didn't even bother to track. I ended up gaining 2 pounds! I am so angry at myself for being so stupid and not even trying to to avoid the temptation of all those fried and fatty foods. I am better than that, I owe it to myself to be better than that.

Obviously I am NOT happy about a 2 pound gain this week. That is just unacceptable and I have to make sure that I get rid of those 2 pounds ASAP or they could turn into 4, 6 or 8 pounds. Once you slip you have to catch yourself quickly and get back on the right track. So I have been tracking everything I eat. The other night I ate a snack (can't even remember what it was so I am sure it was really yummy - NOT) and I thought "I'm not going to bother to track this" and then I said to myself "Just because you don't track it doesn't mean you didn't eat it." and I ended up tracking it after all.

I guess maybe the 2 pound gain has been a bit of a reality check for me. I had been slacking a lot in tracking and in my exercising. NOT ANYMORE! I have been tracking everything I put in my mouth. AND I have started exercising again each day. Because I have been lazy for the last several weeks I have started off a little slow. I do 30 minutes on the treadmill 6 days a week, and every other day I also do a 35 minute yoga routine on my Wii Fit. I am really enjoying the yoga maybe I can find a class to go to once or twice a week.

Along with the 2 pound gain I had a scare this week as well. On Sunday night I started getting some really sharp pains in my left shoulder, then it started radiating across my back and  down my left arm. My first thought was "Oh my gosh, there is something wrong with my heart" and I started thinking about all the fatty fried foods I had eaten over the weekend, and I also started thinking about my mom. I lost my mom when I was 23 years old, she was only 54 years old, and she died from congestive heart failure, brought on by heart disease. My mom battled her weight for as long as I could remember. She tried every possible diet or program out there. They all worked until she stopped doing them, of course, and then she would gain the weight back and then some. I think that my mom could have been the poster child for why diets don't work. Which is the biggest reason I like WW, it isn't a diet, it teaches you a new lifestyle. On top of my mother dying at a young age from heart disease I have a grandfather, an aunt, and an uncle who all died of massive heart attacks also at fairly young ages. So of course when I get this strange sudden pain in my left shoulder, I began to freak out slightly. So on Tuesday I went to the doctor and, to my relief, he diagnosed it as muscle spasms and he gave me Naproxin and a muscle relaxer which have been of tremendous help.

While at the doctor, because of my family history, he did an EKG just to be on the safe side. When he came back he said to me that my EKG looked great and he said "It looks like the EKG of someone who exercises" I immediately started thinking that I hadn't been exercising recently but that I had better get my lazy butt off the couch or out of the computer chair and back on the treadmill and yoga mat. It was the first real confirmation for me that this new lifestyle was not just making me look good on the outside but also making me "look" good on the inside as well. I've NEVER had anyone say to me "Wow you look like you exercise" and to be honest, I think that I felt WAY better when my doctor said that my EKG looked like I exercise than I would if someone said it about my body. Strange? Maybe, but with a family history like mine I want the "hot looking" EKG more than the hot looking body. Actually, I want BOTH!!!
~~Lead me not into temptation, but deliver me from evil~~


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